Typical Teen Issues root in Early Childhood Family Practice
Rebellion, grades, distraction, back answering, discipline, stress, and fear of failure: these are attitudes that’s extremely subtle, it does not ring a bell immediately, nor appear to resonate with the typical teen issues. Yet these once incorporated, will hold you in good stead right through student years, career and old age too.
What is Stress? What is dissatisfaction?
What is inner conflict? What is the “feeling” of rejection?
What is depression? What is anger?
What is loss of self- esteem? What is social pressure?
What is quarter life and mid life crisis?
The common thread in all of these are “threatening”, negative mental and emotional manifestations that come out of not getting what we think is our “entitlement”.
Today’s generation, thinks they are ENTITLED to get everything. Why?
Because we faltered in raising them with “instant gratification”. How?
“Mom, I’m hungry”.....here’s a bag of chips!
“Mom I’m bored”…. Here’s the TV remote/i-pad/smartphone!
The supposedly well-meaning moms go an extra mile to dump the kid into structured activities and classes where the kids go like robots and end up worse than before, because then they don’t know how to handle unstructured activity and free time! They are deprived of a natural instinct to tinker, create and innovate.
“Mom, how do I solve this?” Ask Google!
We wonder why so many teens are stressed and turning to violence, substance abuse, social awkwardness, depression and suicide, and the answer to all of that is because we did not give them the space to explore unstructured free play in their younger years. TVs and I pads took the place of friends and family. Google replaced the teachers and mentors. Kids misunderstand being social for being on social networking sites, and the neighbourhood aunty isn’t even greeted with a ‘Good morning’ in the elevator!
There was never any need for child psychologists two decades back, because the family structure around the child ensured human bonding that kept his emotional and mental health in check. The internet can never replace that.
So what CAN be done?
Start with yourself and your attitude within the home and with your own peers, employees, employers and acquaintances. Develop an attitude of gratitude.
- For example, a simple change as referring to your housemaid as a “helper” instead of “servant” can make a vast difference in how you and your young children perceive her.
- When you go for PTA meets and open house with the child, openly express your gratitude to the child’s teachers for their collaborative effort in the child’s developmental milestones.
- Make it a point to appreciate and acknowledge the good in everything and everyone, before your child. “Please, Sorry, Thank You”, the three magic words we learned as kids need to be incorporated into our daily interaction.
The child will gradually start adopting an attitude of gratitude over entitlement! This will make the child kinder, communication will be more effective and he will slowly but surely get over the “ I want”, “ I should’ve got” mindset. Your child will also stop comparing himself with his peers and remain happier. You will see a vast improvement in the child’s EQ, holistic health and performance in every field.
The human mind is a complex place. If we want to truly manifest abundance and happiness, we need to make subtle improvements at subconscious level. The younger the children, the better the result!
Disclaimer: The views expressed in the article above are those of the authors' and do not necessarily represent or reflect the views of this publishing house
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